Maybe Writing will Help

Maybe writing ten minutes every few days will help stimulate my consciousness. Since this is not a time when I can diet or lose weight, maybe I can take a few minutes each day to reflect and try to learn about my relationship to food. Or is meditation the right answer? Who knows, but I will try this now.

What I know today is that I hate food. I wish I never had to eat. I wish I could just get through the day and have my fun and do my jobs and love my people and be free from food. What I know is that I am so distracted when I eat...anxious or watching Emmett, or bored/anxious/feeling out of control when out with friends, I cannot seem to focus and be in touch with my body or hunger.

I have no answers tonight. Just a willingness to explore, even though it drives me nuts that one session of writing won't solve anything. Ugh.

Yet I am determined to have a healthier relationship to food. Tomorrow I will write out what my goals for that relationship are.